And yet, I have deep regret. My experience with the various providers was that they were interested in restricting me to a certain way of being, that I was to be a woman who was straight, wore overtly feminine clothing and wore makeup, gave up any interests which they considered even questionable for women, and wanted SRS. That wasn’t me; I’m a lesbian woman whose dress varies greatly, never wears makeup, rides motorcycles, and is proud of her professional career. I had also wanted to be non-op but, in the course of questionable actions taken by my physicians, I came to experience dysphoria about my genitals that I could no longer handle, and was advised that SRS would address that. In a sense it did, but it has brought me new dysphoria about my body, specifically my genitals, and I have much regret about a significant portion of my transition as a result.

Sometimes, the issue is physicians and mental health professionals enforcing their biases onto trans people.

Is the wife truly happy with an unhappy husband that is living a lie?? We of course cannot know what is the true state of affairs, Chuck Klosterman (The New York Times ‘Ethicist’) is making things worse not better by going to a position that in the end will make the wife feel even worse.

Gender Dysphoria is not something anyone other than the person in the condition really understands, outwardly you seem fine, but inside it is a death of a million cuts, every day that passes, a minute part of your soul dies, and a dying soul is the worst kind of thing to have.

“When you made the decision to have children, you committed yourself to the sacrifice of significant personal freedoms for the betterment of their lives”, yes for the most part this might be true, however children grow up, they mature, they are more and more able to understand the situation, and saying that you will harm them, is not true, many hundreds of people have transitioned with children and those children have gone on to lead productive successful lives, Jennifer Flynn-Boylan is a case in point, her children have flourished and excelled in school.

In fact we are now at a point where children are themselves coming forward and transitioning, with the advent of the world wide web, and an accepting media, it is less shameful know than it was 20 years ago when I was a child wanting to be the true gender I was, and not the birth male I was.

My advice talk to the children, the wife, have a family conversation, you never know what might be the response, and if it is negative, then the problem is not the “dad” it is the wife and children, they have issues to deal with..